I don't think I will get to go out with Squid again.


its pissifying (errr) tt ppl become angels and do god's perintahs during ramadhan but be devils and do bad things on other months. Its ok if they're trying to improve themselves, meaning the doing of good continues after ramadhan is over too. but if all they are trying to do is be good muslims in ramadhan and just be a muslim as namesake on others, den its just pointless.

a poster at darul aman just now really caught my eye. the words just seem to be beautiful. "Don't Just Be A Muslim, Be A Good Muslim".

so it brings back to yesterday. there goes an attempt at 100% terawih dis ramadhan. after buka yesterday i did maghrib and lie down. i woke up and it was 1130pm.

and i just can't stop listening to Gallery by Mario Vasquez.


Today after subuh, i was asked this question by my brother.

"How come mother is rarely angry at you and if she is, it'll last only for a while"

and i told him.

"Mesti pandai jaga hati biar tak angry. Kalau angry, be extra nice"

Hehe. But its true. U must initiate conversations, even if she doesn't respond. Eventually she'll say something and there you go! no more silent treatment. and seriously, singing works really well. The magic of music.

I recommend Ibu Mithali by Rabbani and Untukmu Ibu by Exist.

HAhaHAhaHA


I hope all my frens have a gf soon. so when some event comes up and we all come, i'll be like the one without one. That'll make me cool. HaHA!

"Look! Its shaiful, the COOL one."

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Owhh i have this friend from Switzerland. Her name is Jasmin. I wonder if she realises i'm muslim. On msn:

Jas: How r u?
Me: im fine. but hungry. fasting.

Well i guess not. tt didnt really scream MUSLIM.

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Anyway, had a great dream. But shall not elaborate further on it. No its no kinky R21, M18 kinda thing, silly. But it was a beautiful dream.

It was so nice, i hate it. WHY? upon waking up, its really nothing but just a dream. I dunno if ive wrote abt it b4 but good dreams make u sad or angry, but bad dreams make u happy and joyous. why?

When u hv a good dream, u'll wish it was for real. but it is not. So ur sad and/or angry.

When u have a bad dream, u'll wake up glad it was only a dream.

Understand?

but sometimes, dreams come true.
i hope this one does.


Damn school is sucha drag. I actually have 2 and a half hrs b4 the next class. And i cant go eat or wadever so its just me and the comp.

Anyway.
Growing up is scary. But i guess thats life. Its scary not knowing wads there in ur future. Like wad will happen when i step out of this computer lab or wads gonna happen in the train on my way home. Looking further, how well will my life be? will i be married? will i take care of my parents like i had promised? yea. most of all, will thr actually BE a future. kiamat and death. Arent they scary stuff.

Since growing up is not escapable, we must look forward to the joys tt could be present. like an early dismissal, a seat on the train. or getting married wif the person u love, have a child. damn i'd lorve to hear the words "dear, im pregnant". well, AFTER marriage of course. and pregnant with MY child. hohoho.

you make my headspin.


Was thinking about NS. I'd rather be in Police or CD since more chances of having real life situations. Like catching criminals or fighting fire. Army? What real war are we gonna fight? Well unless they send me abroad den Army would be fine.

How i wish i'm my brother. Gonna spend one yr in Australia in 2008 for studies.

Ppl want free time, but i want to be busy. Hoho. I guess bcos being busy makes me have something to do.

-----------------------------------------

Semalam as usual slept after subuh. den at zuhor i woke up and prayed, eat a panadol and went back to sleep. Noone was at home. I woke up when my parents returned and shortly, Kamal called. He asked me to come Bedok to hang out. Since i had nothing to do and this week, i'd go out with anyone hu asks me out (provided i haven got initial plans), i went over. Even tho i was sick.

We chilled and talked abt secondary school. God how i wished i was close to him and his friends back then. They had so much fun. Me and my friends did have fun too. But his was mischievious fun. Ohwells.

Abt school. How we want to concentrate on school dis sem. Haha rite.. Buih. How we realised we're so picky abt girls. But tts not a bad thing. U shld be. We're not anything goes kinda ppl. He wants someone who has balanced jambuness and brainyness. Well i dun mind a dumb girl. HAHA. But i want someone who is pretty and also has good moral values. Picky huh.

Bleah. 8pm, off to bike prac and home respectively.


I am feeling sick. Very sick. I thought some barley would help. It did, for awhile. But sick again after some time.

Being sick feels so weird.

-----------------------------

Anyway, i remembered a time arnd 2mths ago when pops called me to sit with him bcos he wants to talk. He asked me whether i smoke. Den he said kalau kau isap rokok, baik berhenti. Pertama, harga dia mahal. Kedua, kau tu sakit. Ketiga, kau sendiri nampak braper susah bapak nak berhenti dulu.

Gee.. i actually diden see the msg conveyed but wad i saw was the fact tt money is at pertama and my health is at kedua. Haha.


I like the phrase "Too Busy For Shaiful". Hoho. Used it on Hidayah yesterday. And in reply i got a "Too Cool For Hidayah". Nyahah! Hid, ur replies amuse me. Like intelligent replies. Dig?

So anyway, the trip to bugis yesterday seemed like a waste of time bcos the shop was closed. But luckily, it ended up quite enjoyable. The Chinese member tak dtg so its only me and kamal. So pergi duduk at the Bugis Junction mac. Bual2 sampai kawan kamal, boy, datang. Den pergi depan Masjid Sultan makan murtabak. I usually don't eat murtabak bcos of over population of onions in them but yesterday's one was not tt bad. Only a few so i just gasak ajer lah.

Den went to duduk2 luar the bugis junction starbucks. duduk2 berbual, smoke (heh). It was a hilarious time. Sit with them is fun ah. But one thing is diorg tgk prp semacam. Like if i see a cute girl, i will just like look abit and stop looking forever. But dey are those hu tegur the girls.

Like those nurses. nyahaha.

"Missy~"


If whey protein doesn't help my condition, i dunno what will.


Malas sia nak go bugis! But have to lor. For the sake of fyp. kul 5 petang pt bugis. I am so malas to go out when dah petang. to me the best time is ard rite aft zuhor.

U noe? As the days go by, life seems to be getting boring and boring. Probably due to the fact that schools gonna start in a week. I wanna go do some fun stuff. But u noe.. those close frens of mine are busy with NS and others with promos. Fitri with his super crazyly long attachment and usop with his work. U noe, the only close fren left is raudah. Hoho. But she has her fityan frens. Oh My.

Even my mum could see the boredom in me. "Adik kau tu boring ker aper? asyik menjahit aper2 ajer".

I guess it is to be said tt its not how many frens u got, its how many ur close to tt matters.

Tt said, i cant forget the fact tt me and fuad waited 2 hrs on saturday for Usop's frens to come to the futsal. but they nvr did show up. maybe yusoff's not playing, they dont want to play. but seriously, it was a letdown. Adding to tt, the futsal seems to be deserted nowadays. No other teams come thr anymore. And i hv no idea why.

So me, fuad and fuad's fren went arnd bedok looking for opponents. hoho. the only place ppl were playing was at siglap cc. but wad did dey say? "ouhh sorry we're going off already". Rite~ tts the oldest trick in the book.


i was told quite some time ago, that a man shld plant many flowers. and water them with love equally. and the one that blossoms, he picks up.

but i guess some ppl just don't do that. instead, they plant one flower and shower that flower with all his love. and on most occasions, tt flower won't bloom. den, another guy wld come by and pluck it and puts it among his many flowers. and tt flower blooms. its a weird world.

------------------------------------

i wasnt in a good mood. so i did my own stuff and not disturbing others. but why? why must i be disturbed?

why does my father and mother not appreciate me? why do they always talk abt how a daughter wld be better? how much a daughter wld help arnd the hse and all. dun u noe wad dis is doing to me emotionally?

i feel like an unwanted. and when i tell them abt hu bought the bekal for dad just now and hu was the one hu painted the hse, wad wld dad say? "memang patut".

i want to be appreciated. to be loved. jahat sgt ker aku nie? bnyk ker salah aku pd kamu berdua? how i wish for the existance of neverland. be one of the lost boys. whr theres no adults except those pirates. hu wld be fun to kick their asses. whr everythng is fun. whr girls are seen as disgusting.

whr stress is not a word ever heard
whr sadness is non-existance
whr days are filled with joy
whr u cld do anything u want
whr u do not need to worry abt finance
about homeworks and assignments
whr everyone is nice
don't u ever wish for a place like tt
whr u nvr will grow old.
whr thr are no unhappy thoughts

but tt place is only an imagination. ouh god y.




Hows this for a Singapore Jersey?


After 2 and a half years, i finally went to a movie with a squid girl. Now now.. its nothing. just friends hanging out.

I enjoyed the company nonetheless. But i did hope that the movie did not end cos movie ends equals going home and going home means.. well... going home. but going home wasnt tt bad bcos we can talk during the journey. I did talk bcos i dont want to end up a quiet, boring person. Which i think i am. As dzul mas said, shaiful is a man of few words. hahaha. suara mahal dokk~ But talking is really nice. =D

I hope to hang out with u again. But maybe i wont be able to. geez. Yelah, i might not be cool enuff. Nyahah!

Well in total, spent only $7 today with her, besides tambang mrt and bus. We diden buy any popcorn or drinks. And that is a good thing. Cos we can save~! I am so into saving nowadays. haha. Saw a POSB near her place and immediately went in to deposit some cash.

Bukan aper... its for the future. LOL. But mom will always say "dah save bnyk2, lepas tu pinjamkan kawan, tak bayar2". and pops will say "kau kaya eh? slalu bayarkan utk kwn dulu."

Gee.. sometimes they make me feel like im being taken advantage of by my own friends. AM I?!

well at least its not as bad as "duit dgn mak bapak lokek, dgn minah tak lokek". which mum said to me abt brother. Haha.


I shld be gg to sleep. need to wake up early tmrw to go kubor. to plant tree. hehe. and cut grass and wash and everything.

and i need money. have not been going out past few days so i wont use my pocket money. and earned $10 while at home doing some altering work for my bro's shirts. 4 for $10. But im still hungry for more. no its not greed. I am just in serious need for money so i wont go broke when im out with squid. hehe. ;)

So u ppl who owe me money! pay up. $32 frm Mr I. $10 from Mr F and Mr FU each. $5 from Mr L. $50 from Mr U. PAY UP PAY UP!